Poles of Inconvenience

Poles of Inconvenience Because straight lines are not for adventures.

14/12/2024

The Poles of Inconvenience 2024 was a honking good time—literally.

From beeping through mountain passes to getting honked across the line, it was chaos, carnage, and louder than a gang of angry geese wearing clown shoes.

The Dirty Buzzard duo—Daniel and Ephiram () — proved we don’t mess about with inconvenience. From mountain passes, deep ...
11/12/2024

The Dirty Buzzard duo—Daniel and Ephiram () — proved we don’t mess about with inconvenience.

From mountain passes, deep ravines, and raging rivers, to towns like ... well, you can see. Our Poles are planted with pinpoint awkwardness and utmost seriousness.

A masterclass in purposeful suffering and juvenile nonsense.

Forget — snug as a bug in a rug.Try: Snug as a human Jenga tower of inconvenience wedged into a glorious sardine tin. Sl...
09/12/2024

Forget — snug as a bug in a rug.

Try: Snug as a human Jenga tower of inconvenience wedged into a glorious sardine tin.

Slightly less pithy, but much more accurate. Taken on Poles of Inconvenience 2022.

If you squint—or if you’ve got the eagle-eyed gaze of an adventurer used to spotting nonsense—you might just make out wh...
07/12/2024

If you squint—or if you’ve got the eagle-eyed gaze of an adventurer used to spotting nonsense—you might just make out what some would generously call a ‘map.’

It’s less Ordnance Survey and more bathroom wall. Every squiggle shorthand for: 'where in this troll doll's haircut are we now.'

The Rude Brothers () showing how it's done on the Poles 2024.

A short visual journey to encapsulate The Poles of Inconvenience.Designed by our loose committee of maniacs who thought,...
04/12/2024

A short visual journey to encapsulate The Poles of Inconvenience.

Designed by our loose committee of maniacs who thought, ‘Let’s take a very difficult adventure and make it ... you know, harder."

The Poles not just obstacles—they’re insults to logic, a middle finger to reason, and a love letter to chaos.

Here is on the Poles of Inconvenience 2024, overcoming our nonsense with a smile.

30/11/2024

Take one plucky Nissan Micra and hurl it sideways at a dusty hill until that cocky dirt mound knows its place.

Or until your trusty heap of bolts explodes in a cloud of shame, leaving you to try to sell the debris for spare parts somewhere in a Slovenian forest.

Welcome to the Poles of Inconvenience.

The Baguette Bandits turned an unsuspecting Peugeot 205 into the ultimate adventure machine. They Frankensteined this be...
27/11/2024

The Baguette Bandits turned an unsuspecting Peugeot 205 into the ultimate adventure machine. They Frankensteined this beauty into a Poles-ready monster—as much as anything can truly be 'ready' for the Poles of Inconvenience.

They followed the classic formula: more paint = fewer breakdowns.

The ‘Boom’ decal over the engine? Perfectly placed for when they careen into a frosty lake and it promptly explodes. This is what happens when you spend far too many late nights tinkering with a car in a romantically lit garage.

" Day 2:Jake woke up with frozen toes and refueled with the classic camping breakfast of leftover crisps. He was keen to...
25/11/2024

" Day 2:

Jake woke up with frozen toes and refueled with the classic camping breakfast of leftover crisps. He was keen to get going and piled the rest of us half asleep into Felicia. We set off for our first pole “maybe impossible”; as its name suggests it was not the friendliest affair. We picked up a friend of Estanis’, Guille, who has knowledge of the area like a sherpa. We arrived at the bottom of the mountain and were optimistic for a one up one down walk in the park. Much to our disappointment, it was a lot more difficult…

We split off into two teams with different trail ideas. It was an obvious opportunity for a Spain vs England rematch. The english, as usual, quite literally fell at the first hurdle. Jake took a tumble and 5 minutes into our hike we were out of water and had a rolled ankle to overcome. The mountain to climb already seemed to have doubled in size. After a bout of altitude induced nausea and some generous pauses from Estanis and Guille, we regrouped and headed for the summit. Two hours in, we reached the summit of the highest ski lift in Spain at 2758m. With high spirits and a rusty ski acquired the way down was a breeze. Felicia couldn’t contain her excitement and w**d herself of her entire coolant reservoir. Rolling in neutral all the way down, we decided we needed lunch.

After showering at Guille’s, we worked out Carbonne, France, was our next campsite. Guille is joining further us on his much more off-road minded motocross bike. Alternating frying our brakes and engine we made good progress across the border to France. In typical French fashion we were greeted with mist, drizzle and the flash of a speeding camera at the boarder. A short recap of the conversation that took place :

Estanis, “Slow down”. Nat looks over without braking, “What’s the limit?” Estanis, “Slow down”. Nat proceeds to lightly tap the breaks as the flash of a hidden camera is forever impinted into our memories. We already had enough to worry about on the Felicia front; it is safe to say the rain and the flash brought us deep into our feelings and not a word was spoken the rest of the drive to Carbonne." — The Three Unwise Men.

On the Poles of Inconvenience 2023, Game of Tows truly honoured the sacred Adventurists tradition of catastrophic breakd...
23/11/2024

On the Poles of Inconvenience 2023, Game of Tows truly honoured the sacred Adventurists tradition of catastrophic breakdowns by hitting the repair zone quicker than a fly’s heartbeat.

The tone was set right from the off, with Simon, Jim, and Kip diving under the bonnet, armed with nothing but duct tape and a dodgy YouTube tutorial before even turning the key.

A lesson in automotive disassembly, shedding parts and dignity at practically every opportunity. Well done.

Four creamy guys in one stanky car (their words, not ours): Team Creamy Crew took on the Poles of Inconvenience 2023 wit...
20/11/2024

Four creamy guys in one stanky car (their words, not ours): Team Creamy Crew took on the Poles of Inconvenience 2023 with all the grace of a fridge launched out of an aeroplane. Thomas Tveiten Lewis, Jan Harald Langeland, Martin Furevik, and Alexander Tripodianos took their trusty Toyota deep into the desert and showed it the burned out ghost of adventure future.

Team  : proving minimalism is overrated. As long as you’ve got a roof rack the size of a cruise ship you'll be fine. It'...
18/11/2024

Team : proving minimalism is overrated.

As long as you’ve got a roof rack the size of a cruise ship you'll be fine. It's ideal for transporting an upright human man through a large wood (see photo).

But less ideal for coaxing a sputtering engine across Europe’s pointiest mountains and trenchy-est valleys.

Masterful impracticality. And if you think that’s a problem, you've got a potted plant for a hat. Well done, lads.

Team .knobs won the Best Vehicle Award on the 2022 rally for their 1958 Morris Oxford. Here's a list of just a few reaso...
16/11/2024

Team .knobs won the Best Vehicle Award on the 2022 rally for their 1958 Morris Oxford. Here's a list of just a few reasons why:⁠

- It didn't even start when they bought it.⁠
- "Coolant was pi***ng out of the side of the head. In layman’s terms, the engine was fu**ed." ⁠
- They were on engine number 3 before they left the UK.⁠
- The rear wheel fell off.⁠
- It got stuck in a ditch.⁠
- "The bonnet decided it didn’t want to be attached to the car anymore and for lack of a better phrase, fu**ed off into the Spanish countryside. This incident actually turned out to be useful"⁠
- The engine caught fire and melted any and all wiring there was.⁠

It was perfect.

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