17/05/2026
🚨 NEW RECRUIT ANNOUNCEMENT 🚨
Big day earlier this week at as we welcomed our newest “partner” from .
Under the proposed 47% capital gains tax scheme, it’s a pretty tidy arrangement:
The trucks? Mine.
The finance? Mine.
The staff? Mine.
The stress? Mine.
The tax? Also mine.
But if the business ever succeeds enough to sell, he’d like 47% of the uplift.
No 2am driver calls.
No fuel bills.
No tyre accounts.
No chasing freight.
No explaining why transport actually costs money.
Just the good bit.
For his first day, we ran through trucks, configurations, who’s going where, compliance, stagnant rates, rising fuel costs and the joy of trying to keep freight moving safely and legally.
We also discussed overseas drivers being able to come here and potentially operate 64 tonne combinations or greater with little to no Australian heavy vehicle experience.
He agreed with the idea. Apparently that’s “solving the driver shortage”.
Finally, we covered fuel prices and the extra revenue government receives every time diesel goes up.
Again, no issue.
To be fair, he brought coffee and donuts, so we’ll give him points for that.
Not sure the suit and tie look will survive long here, but we’ll reserve judgement until he’s done a night shift and quoted a job at 2010 rates. But he did get one part of his attire right. He did say he loves our hats from Country Trucker Caps
Welcome aboard.
You don’t get the trucks.
You don’t get the stress.
But you do get 47%.
Here’s a photo of the new recruit when one of the staff mentioned he should have taken more than 47%.
DISCLAIMER:
For the 2 sad sacks in the room, not mentioning any names (Hayden and Marc). This is just a joke. It’s a bit of fun floating around the internet. It’s not real. It’s AI.
Albo has never stepped foot in our office.
Have a cuddle and cheer up!
Oh we don’t plan on giving him 47% either 😜